Jacqueline

And every year, I get something beautiful! I would be very happy with these gifts.

JoAnn is up and feeling much better, even ate some breakfast. :D Yay!!!

Things keep moving on in the household at Faerie Gardens, sometimes time seems to pass slowly and sometimes quickly, but it is always moving forward.

JoAnn is sick. Diana and I both seemed very slightly sick with what seemed to be a very minor cold, but as is so often the case, JoAnn is much sicker. I am taking good care of her, keeping her hydrated, entertaining her when she is up to it, making sure that all her *jobs* get done, and she is a trooper as usual, but it is so hard seeing my sweet JoAnn sick!

Lia is excited about the holidays, and yesterday went on a major cleaning spree in anticipation of decorating. I am excited about decorating too, but it can be hard to find the time! Lia has been watching That's So Raven reruns on the computer and writing and helping a lot in the kitchen including making special sauces and tasty breakfasts and lunches for herself and her sisters. She also somehow got the job of doing major hair repair on all of the American girl dolls. She developed some methods that we have not seen online and did such a good job that even Esme trusted her with her dolls' hair. Perhaps this grew out of her nightly hairstyling sessions with Diana.

Ant has been participating in some long term project with Mabinogi that involves feeding a snowy owl once an hour for four hours every day! It is wearing him down, but it is important to him, and he certainly has diligence in the endeavor. He is also going to repair a few things for me this week and has his usual responsibilities of filling bird feeders, adjusting downed trees, and picking up the yard. If the snow holds off another month, I may have a few extra projects for him.

Es won Nanowrimo!!! She is the first person in our family to achieve this feat! I can't wait to read her novel.

Diana is busy planning crafts for Christmas and studying chemistry and taking care of me.

I am busy taking care of house and kids and Benji, and of course Diana too!

Things I am thankful for today -

*I can take a shower with minimal pain! (Something I definitely couldn't do when I was having problems with my back.

*I can just get up and do tons of things without terrible pain and exhaustion!

*I get to spend a lot of time with my grandson.

*I get to spend a lot of time with my four kids who are still at home.

*I can talk to my eldest daughter pretty much whenever I want online.

*We have two mostly sweet Guinea pigs and one mostly sweet cat.

*I have access to a lot of music to listen to on Youtube.

*Coffee and a hot breakfast almost everyday!

*That automatic washing machine! I just can't get over that!

*As always, my wonderful girlfriend Diana!

I thought I'd post a gratitude list to go hand in hand with my wish list. These are things (and people, etc) that I am very grateful for everyday. My heart often overflows with joy at how lucky I am! In no particular order...

1. automatic washing machine and dryer

2. street legal, working car big enough to hold our whole family comfortably

3. girl friend with driver's licence to drive the above mentioned vehicle

4. girl friend who is willing to work at a job she mostly dislikes to support her family

5. girl friend who loves me 100%, unconditionally!

6. my kids for being exactly who that are

7. enough food for my family and me to not go hungry

8. the ability to heat our home when it is cold

9. electricity to run many of the things on this list although perhaps most importantly our water pump

10. indoor plumbing

11. internet

12. library card for OCPL (actually it is the gf who has the card so perhaps her willingness to share it)

13. the sun

14. that my legs and arms and hands and feet and all five senses work pretty well

Since it has been requested -

Step One
- Make a post (public, friends locked, filtered...whatever you're comfortable with) to your LJ. The post should contain your list of 10 holiday wishes. The wishes can be anything at all, from simple and fandom-related ("I'd love a Snape/Hermione icon that's just for me") to medium ("I wish for _____ on DVD") to really big ("All I want for Christmas is a new car/computer/house/TV.") The important thing is, make sure these wishes are things you really, truly want.

- If you wish for real life things (not fics or icons), make sure you include some sort of contact info in your post, whether it's your address or just your email address where Santa (or one of his elves) could get in touch with you.

- Also, make sure you post some version of these guidelines in your LJ, or link to this post (it'll be public) so that the holiday joy will spread.

Step Two
- Surf around your friendslist (or friends friends, or just random journals, or holiday_wishes/wish_list) to see who has posted their list. And now here's the important part:

- If you see a wish you can grant, and it's in your heart to do so, make someone's wish come true. Sometimes someone's trash is another's treasure, and if you have a leather jacket you don't want or a gift certificate you won't use--or even know where you could get someone's dream purebred Basset Hound for free--do it.

You needn't spend money on these wishes unless you want to. The point isn't to put people out, it's to provide everyone a chance to be someone else's holiday elf--to spread the joy. Gifts can be made anonymously or not--it's your call.

There are no rules with this project, no guarantees, and no strings attached. Just...wish, and it might come true. Give, and you might receive. And you'll have the joy of knowing you made someone's holiday special.

( Wish List Here! )

Sometimes I feel bad because all of my family's special times need to be kept simple because I am sick.

I try to look on the good side of things though. These times are suppose to be times of rest, and it is good that I can rest too. My family has learned that you can have wonderful festivities in the simplest of ways with minimal planning and preparation.

Today I put Benji in the sleepywrap and took him for a walk in the woods. He loved it! I also swung him in the hammock a bit which he also found fun.

LJ is the place I go to write things that I feel compelled to write, but I don't feel safe writing anywhere else. Then I wonder who I am willing to let see them.

I use to be a lot more open.

You can't make real connections if you aren't more open though. I just don't like criticism. I am perfectly capable of criticizing myself! ROTFL

Honestly, I think all the time. I second guess everything. I have a near photographic memory, at least for words. I can be racked with guilt. (Which of course, I criticize myself for because you can't change the past so you shouldn't let it bother you!)

I have never received criticism from another human being that I hadn't already thought myself.

Today is a windy day! I think I will go out into it.

Benji woke twice last night. It is the first time that he has done that here. The night before he slept the whole night! (Well 11 - 6:45) I was tired this morning, but I showered during Benji's happy time, and then gave him a bath and then fed him, and then laid him in the bed with me, and slept off and on while he did too. Josie and Lia got up at noon and took over. :) I am now eating and trying to feel awake! I have a lot of things I would like to do today.

I started the Twilight series a couple of months ago and have been reading the books off and on as they come in at the library. It is OK. Definitely good enough to make me want to read the next book to see what happens. (I am currently working on Eclipse.) Since I am nearly the last person I know to read these books, it is very cool 'cause I can talk about them mostly freely while reading without worrying about the spoiler factor. (Don't worry; I wouldn't post a spoiler in an open entry like this; I would put it under a cut with a warning. I hate spoilers myself!)

I have teased Diana because she put down that Twilight was amazing on her Goodreads page. I shouldn't do that. She has a right to like books that are only so/so to me. I certainly like books that she doesn't. I can fall in love with a book over one line in the last chapter, ROTFL! She also judges books differently than me. I often like to pull them apart while she is far more capable of just loving a good story. (Perhaps that is why she likes movies, and I don't.) The fact is that she agrees with me about all of Twilight's flaws, and yet still finds it amazing 'cause she likes the story. That is what a novel is suppose to be isn't it?

That's all for now...

And I shall post this open. Why not?

You Are Crisp Autumn Morning Air

You love to feel alive and awake. For you, fall is somewhat of a rebirth. Even though autumn brings some death, it always makes you feel vibrant and excited. Something about cooler days, longer nights, and changing leaves deeply touches you. You feel motivated and driven in the fall. You feel like you can start over and be whoever you want to be.

You Are Most at Home in the Bedroom

You're the type of person who finds sanctuary in your home. Your home is your private space. While you may be a social person outside the home, it's very rare that you invite people into your home. There's nothing like spending time alone in your bedroom - relaxing and reflecting about your day. You truly treasure your time by yourself. You need to be able to recharge every so often in order to thrive.

So my goals for the day were to thoroughly clean the kitchen window and floor, and to make sure that Diana's crafting table got put together. Nothing is perfect. The window is one that doesn't completely come apart so I couldn't get it 100% clean although it is a whole lot better. I hurt my back so scrubbing the floor was out of the question, but I did move everything and sweep really, really good. (Then I spilled the cactus!) The table is put together, but there is a scratch in it. I am not sure where Diana is going to want everything to go, but I am going to be open to suggestions. I do know that lamps will have to be moved, and it is important that she has some input in that because the lighting has to be right when she is working.

On the good side, the view from the window is beautiful! I hope Diana likes it. I so want to make her happy!

( Here! )

Still dealing with low level stress for no big reasons.

It is nice to have Lia home even though I am use to her being back now.

I am glad for Ant's daily lawn trimming, his pretty much constant positive mood, and his willingness to help even when it isn't convenient.

I am going on a date with my love this weekend.

I like the feel of fall, but I am sad that summer is ending. I want more lake swimming, lots more hiking, more sunshine soaking, and more star/moon gazing.

I am excited that there just might be travel this year! I am trying hard not to get my hopes up though.

Today Diana, Lia, and I spent part of the morning and more of the afternoon out and about shopping and running errands, and I got stressed easily in spite of wonderful things going on in our lives.

A meme is going around where you post your wallpaper, and since I've looked at a few others, I thought I'd post mine.



This was a present from Diana.

Tonight's adventures included a swim in the lake and a stop for ice cream cones. What will tomorrow hold? Taking the trash and returning the videos. Helping Diana's dad with paperwork plus, and helping Diana's mom with disassembling a daybed. Visiting with Emma and Esme and Benji. Picking up Lia and bringing her home! (And of course, a short visit thrown into the mix with Sadie and Jenny.) We will have to eat lunch somewhere, and we may stop at Wegmans.

A busy day it will be, but tonight was full of joy and peace.

I am looking forward to having my little dorkaboo back at home!

I have been dreaming a lot about birds this summer. Nothing shocking, it is odd to me, all these vivid images of birds appearing in my mind each night.

I have often dreamed about birds, robins and sparrows mostly, in my last dream before I wake. Of course, those dreams were most often caused by bird song actually permeating my sleep as the world awakes. The dreams this summer are different.

First, they tend to wake me in the middle of the night when no birds are singing. Second, some of the birds are birds that don't live near us. I dream about crows and ravens. The ravens are distinct from the crows. Although it is possible that there could be a raven where we live it is unlikely. I just watch them. Usually they are on the ground feeding, a large group of crows with one or two ravens in their midst.

I dream of an ostrich. We certainly don't have ostriches in our neck of the woods! (Well maybe on farms but I am not even sure of that!) Just one ostrich walking along a beach.

I dream of watching a peacock through the window of a big house. The peacock is on a rambling, messy yard, hiding behind bushes and overgrown plants nearly playing peek-a-boo with me.

I dream of flocks of colorful song birds, cardinals and goldfinches and indigo buntings as well as other colorful birds that I don't recognize. The flock is in our front yard and lands as a group on the small tree with the feeder, taking turns eating the seeds. Although they are all different birds, they act like they are a group of one kind. Arriving and departing at the same time while I watch from inside the house. Sometimes from the front door. Sometimes from the kitchen window while I sit at the table drinking coffee. (Which isn't actually possible 'cause the angle is wrong.) Sometimes from the living room window which is where I have been known to drink coffee and bird watch on spring mornings.

I dream of waiting in the car somewhere for Diana, and having a group of birds come and sit on the car, so many that I can't see out the windows. The types of birds differ in this recurring dream.

These dreams aren't scary, but they do often wake me. I don't feel particularly anxious or particularly calm or particularly sad or particularly happy in them. I am just there observing, like an outsider.

Here is Benji, four days old.

We are home. It is easy to appreciate the small things when it gets so hectic.

We will be out and about much of the day tomorrow, but then, after that, perhaps things will calm down bit.